<<<One wears the badge of shame by default via gender,>>>
Actually yes there is a badge of shame on a mother who doesn't have custody. As Gonz stated.
Not by default, any one woman who loses custody over a man in court wears it as she earns it. Men walk into the game wearing it and have to fight like hell to depose the bias. I filed for divorce from my wife because of her indiscretions, affairs, not taking her role as a mother. Finally, she became physically abusive as well as mentally and emotionally abusive. She left our home in handcuffs because she tried to threaten me with a knife to my throat in front of our two daughters. I believe the statement made to me was "I'll get you out of here if I have to kill you myelf", and the last words she said leaving our home was to our 9 year old "I hope you're happy". The feminist swarm picked up on "the cause" and came immediately to her rescue. After getting out of jail they put her in a half way house because she was immediately considered a "Classic victim of domestic voilence" with "The classic symptoms of a battered woman". Mind you I filed for the divorce, I live in our marital home with our two daughters who witnessed this entire situation, not my choice, hers. The first thing the judge did was order her to seek counseling. She didn't do it for over 11 months. I was picked apart in court, one motion filed after the other for me to get "anger management evaluation" because *I* had to be the aggressor and she simply was not, she just "acted out after all those years of abuse". Our daughters statements were not allowed because "They are being brain washed by the father". The bullshit was endless, it took almost 2 years. It wasted a lot of resources monitarily and caused us to live a life of hell just because the court or the "system" couldn't wrap their pea brains around the concept that a woman *can* be the aggressor, *can* be wrong. Time was wasted trying to create a auora that I had a anger management problem whilst puddin' was a victim. The longer it took, the more time puddin' had the opportunity to create a new image of credibility or at least bring me down far enough to meet her half way to allow her an even playing field; then out came the "nuturing parent" bullshit. When I got the anger management assessment, I was found to not have one; the swarm insisted I *self evaluated myself* and tricked the individual who assessed me. Meanwhile, nothing for her, no *demands* to push her into one, or motions for contempt because she didn't even get any counseling even when ordered to. Ahh, yes, there is bias.
I fought hard and in the end I won. But you can bet your bippy had I been the one led out of the house in handcuffs for threatening my wife with a knife in front of my children? Please~