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Messages - CaptDMO

Main / Re: A Thought Experiment
Sep 26, 2004, 06:54 PM
Quote from: "typhonblue"
If all women were fat and ugly, women would have no power over men...

Is that a solution?

Um...'s someones opinion.

If all women were 'fat' and 'ugly', then all women would be....average looking. That's all.
Main / Chris Rock on sperm bandits con scheme
Sep 12, 2004, 10:25 PM
Just a thought;

Um... it's essential that young white women are used in these cons, as demographicly, they can approach a wealthier, and less likely to go to police,clientelle for  illegal adoption scam-WHILE THE PATERNITY SCAM IS PLAYED OUT.
The "hard luck" (actually pregers) mother can get cash throughout the pregnancy as well as a lump sum, from more than one couple at the same time, -and still keep/sell elsewhere/abort the baby.

I'm not sure why Nigerian identity is used so often as an alias. This is traditionaly more of an Eastern European /southern states thing.

Sounds impossible?, incredible?-That's why it works! No one (usually) is willing to go to the police.
YES, I lifted this from another site.
Yes, I cited the article.
Yes, these are MY words.
Yes, this is the type of free fear mongering IACP enjoy with the press.
For any concerned, I invite you independent examination of
  The International Association of Chiefs of Police.
Perhaps you may have gotten one of their "This is being recorded" fund raiser calls?

Posted: Sun Aug 29, 2004 3:20 pm    Post subject: And the band kept playing on.........  


I'm not sure where to post this as it strikes me as so wrong, on so many different levels.

On the front page of the NH Sunday News the headline was "Rebuilding Her Sandcastle" The sub title, in bold, was "Survival in Amhearst. She survived the abuse, she survived the dive bombing, and now she's helping others survive. It was different in the on-line edition for the nation to read.

News - August 29, 2004

Surviving wife still struggles with day husband crashed a plane into their home
Sunday News Staff

In 20 years of marriage he had left no visible bruise, but she had long been scarred inside before that Saturday in August 2001 when he destroyed all that defined their lives.

At about 7:25 that sunny morning, a few minutes after his Socata Trinidad rose from the tarmac at Nashua's Boire Field, Louis W. Joy III radioed the control tower to ask if Amherst was "over by the green water tower," the National Transportation Safety Board would later report.

Twelve minutes later, Joy circled the single-engine plane above the lavish house, whose construction he had obsessed over, among the tall trees at 10 High Meadow Lane in Amherst. In an eerie prelude to what would happen at the World Trade Center in just 18 days, he used the plane as a weapon, crashing it into the house, dying amid the burning and exploding rubble.

The Amherst home of Louis W. Joy III on Aug. 25, 2001, after he crashed his plane into it. (BOB LaPREE/UNION LEADER)
In a flash of violence, Jo A. Joy's sandcastle was gone.

Three years later, her life still turns on that moment.

She described the residual effects in an interview with the Sunday News.

She spoke of a potent emotional brew that combines the memory of years of abuse that preceded the climactic event, the violence of that day, and its proximity in time to what terrorists did by crashing commercial airliners into the towers in New York City and the Pentagon.

"It's difficult at times," said Jo, who has taken back her maiden name of Fonda.

"There are a lot of things that can trigger a reaction from me. I'm way better than I used to be in terms of dealing with stress and conflict and things like that, but I still have a lot of wounds that are easily opened."

The prelude
The story, she said, picking the words with care, "isn't in the sensational ending. It's really in what led up to it."

"To the extent that people can gain insight for their own relationships and for those around them who might be in an abusive situation by hearing my example, my story, that is the good I'm looking for," she said.

Mrs. Joy was not in her home on Aug. 25, 2001. She was staying at a hotel with the couple's 8-year-old daughter at the urging of David Lauren, the lawyer who had helped get a restraining order against her husband. Police had served the papers the night before and escorted Louis Joy from the house.

Prescient advice
"I always advise clients not to go back for at least 12 to 24 hours because, unfortunately, there are all too many circumstances where batterers, being told to leave the house, leave and then come back an hour or two later with some form of a weapon," Lauren said.

"When people think of domestic violence, they think of physical violence. They think of bruises, black eyes, broken arms, but domestic violence is all about power and control."

That control can be psychological -- an assault, but purely emotional. It is, the lawyer said, "the most insidious form of domestic violence because it leaves no visible scars."

Such was the case with Jo Fonda.

The early years
She was 16 when she first met Louis Joy, five years her senior. They lived in upstate New York, near Schenectady.

In the 1980s, they worked to put each other through college and earn graduate degrees in business: Louis, at Duke University; Jo, at Penn State's Wharton School.

They lived in North Carolina, New Jersey, on Long Island, N.Y., and in Delaware.

Picture two well-educated, motivated, focused individuals who worked well together.

"We were definitely good business partners," Fonda said.

Teamwork and success
In 1993, they co-authored a trade book, "Frontline Teamwork," that told the story of a fictional manager and his "team" who rejuvenate an ailing manufacturing company. Not a best-seller, but it remains recommended reading in business circles.

"The point of the book wasn't to make a lot of money. It was to grow the consulting business, which it did," Fonda recalled. "It all worked very well. The companies he worked with did really well with his teachings and when they implemented his practices."

Louis Joy was at a stage where he ran his business out of his hat. He had developed a national reputation as a manufacturing and operations management consultant to big-name companies.

Home in New Hampshire
Job changes precipitated some of the Joys' moves, including the one that brought them to New Hampshire.

Fonda remembered how she came north in January 2000, to take a job as financial controller for a high tech firm.

"I moved up first and found some temporary housing and then we all moved up (from Newark, Del.) in July of 2000. We moved into our new house in April 2001," she said.

The house was big -- 5,800 square feet, four bedrooms, five baths, set on 11 acres, valued at $750,000 -- and it reflected Louis Joy's obsession with perfection.

Jo's decision
"Without going into the details, he was a very intense person, a very controlling person, very driven," Fonda said of the man she married. "Those are things that can make you very successful in business, but they can be very difficult in a personal relationship and they eventually led to problems between us that I couldn't deal with any longer. . .

"He didn't change. I changed. I decided that I was not going to live his life anymore. I decided and, so, he lost control over me," Fonda said.

Like her husband, Fonda, who has not worked the past three years, had been successful in business, as a financial manager and controller.
Abuse potential

"I'm a person who wants to make other people happy and do the right think and how I interacted on a personal level with my husband was a different life from how I behaved in public. In school and in business, I was a high achiever.

"In retrospect, they tell me that is very consistent with the model of an abused person because they do tend to excel in areas separate from their abusive partner. That is where they are free to be themselves," she said.

The threats from Louis were never conspicuous.

Seeking help
"I couldn't produce evidence of any physical harm ever having been done to me or any direct threat of physical harm, but I knew his personality and I knew how volatile he could be and I was literally scared for my life and my daughter's life," she said of the heightened anxiety that led her to seek Lauren's counsel that fourth week in August 2001.

"It was on a Thursday," Lauren said of their first meeting. "I think we were just 10 minutes into the conversation when I told her she was a victim of domestic violence."

And it was psychological and emotional abuse that Lauren saw.

"Jo was fighting this alone because there was no one who saw the physical signs. It doesn't leave bruises that might cause friends at work, for instance, to say, 'Are you OK? Are you safe?'"

The very next day, lawyer and client sought a protective order from Milford District Court Judge William R. Drescher. Police served the papers on Louis Joy that night, about 10 hours before he crashed the plane into his home.

Helping others
Over the past 15 months, Fonda has told her story at about a half-dozen training seminars where lawyers, police officers and those who work with abuse victims study the roots of domestic violence.

She began at the invitation of Henniker Police Chief Timothy Russell, who coordinates and teachers courses in domestic violence law at the police academy run by the New Hampshire Police Standards and Training Council.

Russell was in Minneapolis last week at a meeting of top officials of the International Association of Chiefs of Police. Their plan is to establish a training institute on domestic violence for police administrators.

A societal problem
"It has dawned on us that we have . . . to get the command structure to buy into this issue," Russell said. "Fifty percent of the homicides in the nation and in our state are domestic-violence related and if we can all pull in the same direction, maybe we can reduce the death and injury rate to women who are victims of this crime."

Of Fonda, Russell said, "she's bright, very articulate -- an awesome trainer."

She tells her story chronologically, he said, beginning back when she was in her teens.

"You see how, over time, the relationship became more controlling and how she slipped into that environment without realizing it."

The hidden abuse
The police chief said Fonda's story is "extremely worthwhile" for young police officers to hear because many times domestic violence is clearly evident in the physical scars it leaves.

"As heinous as those cases are, those are the easy investigations to do. The hard investigations are those, like Jo Fonda's, that involve emotional abuse where there is no clear and present evidence of abuse."

Russell said Fonda ends her presentation by telling what happened on Aug. 25, 2001, at 10 High Meadow Lane in Amherst.

"And when she does, you hear a collective gasp from the audience because that is not what they are expecting," Russell said.

The rebuilding process
Fonda sold the land at 10 High Meadow Lane. She and her daughter still reside in Amherst, in a big, new house.

"I had a sandcastle and somebody knocked it down. I didn't stop to think of what kind of sandcastle I really need. I just rebuilt one. . . . At that time I was just trying to get my life back to normal again. So, we have much more house than we need," she said.

Her daughter is 11 now.

"She is doing excellently in school. She was on the high honors list last semester. She is very active in a number of different sports. . . . She's just really grown into a very mature, self-confident young lady."

Time to heal
Fonda is 42 now. Her blonde hair is shoulder length, her blue-gray eyes solid. There's strength and gentleness in her words, a touch of gold at her neck and wrist, but nervousness in the hands she grips together as she speaks.

"I don't have lofty goals, in terms of achieving material things. I've never been that way myself and now, more than ever, I know the difference between what is important and what's not important," she said.

"I want to heal and move forward. My focus is on having a well adjusted, happy relationship with my daughter . . .

"She's a kid. That's what she should be doing now, having fun and not being influenced or scarred by her past in any way. She's super and I just want to continue to see her grow and mature and have a great life."
I have no doubt that there was a shitty situation. As I read I waited for the other shoe to drop, but it never did. I couldn't figure out why this piece of sensationalism was dusted off. Then, buried in the middle (as it so often is) was the bit about International Association of Chiefs of Police.

Correct me if I'm wrong with my interpretation but, Chief Russell is calling for "awareness" of administrators and young patrolmen in the investigation and response to DV without evidence. Merely on ones say-so. And he had the paper, and origional reporter, dust off this piece where there is no "He said" as support.

And, of course, there was a sidebar titled "Help is available" listing contact info for The NH Coalition Against Domestic and Sexual Violence, an umbrella org.comprised of 14 independant programs.

In the face of bad statistics, exposed special interest manipulation, abusive and criminal actions by AGs and Asst. AGs, fear mongering lawers, alarmist political wanna-bes, I urge all to keep reading between the lines.

I also urge that the political motivations, and fund raising "tactics" of International Association of Chiefs of Police be scrutinized. I have only seen mostly political, and ZERO law enforcement, issues from them. A venue to law MAKING if you will. In My Humble Opinion their concerns involve more lieniency in arrests of statisticly- males 16-50, and the consequent "state control", once an ACCUSATION of any kind is on ones permanant record.

Now,.. I accept the fact that reporters desperately need readers, and editors desperately need to sell papers. I think the repeated association with the events of 09/11 after the fact was,... well,... We are NOT amused.
Main / What are we all doing here?
Sep 09, 2004, 01:53 PM
Quote from: "angryharry"

I have never been to the USA, but, of course, I have been immersed in much of its culture for quite some time - well; the TV version of it.

  Um, I'm not sure of the polite way to put this.
I suspect that American culture, as depicted on the TV, by the BBC.......... (is the growth of the snowball I'm rolling here too obvious?)

I can only say I've been fortunate enough to oooze about London and the outland shires. Can you possibly imagine my dissapointment when I learned that England wasn't all Benny Hill?

But here's a question. Has the absolute worst, in my humble opinion, common English expression (that I heard far too often)   "...Time please gentleman !......." been politicly corrected, gender neutered, and given sexist status?
Main / How to convice a woman?
Sep 09, 2004, 01:20 PM
I wonder if "The Taming of the Shrew" is still required reading in public schools ?
Main / We never learn
Sep 09, 2004, 01:17 PM
Personally, I've learned to be Twice as suspicious whenever anyone opines "Don't worry"
If you were to ask "What does a man like ABOUT a woman?" I'd have to say-Different things about different women.
 When you ask "So what does a man really like IN a woman?" I'd have to say, quite simply- Mr.Happy!

Thanks for the set up
Main / Right name!
Sep 01, 2004, 08:02 PM
On the other hand, if one means to imply someone that exists solely by wound strings, wildly spinning through illogical direction, whos only function seems to be repeatedly knock down anything phallic that may be in their path, I recommend  "skittle"
Main / Right name!
Sep 01, 2004, 07:47 PM
I'v been called a dick, dick head, swinging dick, swordswain, prick, flaming prick, cock head, cock sucker, and of course, "you're such a typical male"

I already have a genitalia based name for gender-centric folk (of both apparent sexes) that I save for when I REALLY wish to express my value of their current opinion and intellegence. Of course, once used there is no doubt, and no going back....
Main / OT -- Weird image -- It moves!
Aug 31, 2004, 10:00 PM
Oh goody,.......  Now I can't focus, I think I sprained my tongue, and the top of my head hurts!
Main / Oligarchy: The Utopian System
Aug 29, 2004, 10:55 PM
In My Humble Opinion-
 It's all the same crap. It's always the same formula.

Maybe it's just me but- there are 7 basic plots of a good story. Plug in the modern societal variables and voila  history repeats itself in a renewed cycle. Write in opposition of the current ,or currently conspireing, heavy hitters and one  finds themselves in deep do-do "for public saftey and defense" or "for the good of the people and the economy", and of course "for the children and our future". Ask anyone over 70 what they think about what they've seen just in their lifetime.

Personally, I reccomend the movie They Lived(by John Carpenter of all people)  It demonstrates the political/wealth, sociological/natural resource, and military/police aspects of "tower building" without having to sit through decades of lecture halls. Besides,...... it has all the cool "secret society" stuff in living color.

Over simplified?-You bet!
I thought that, while slanted, it was a good piece, digging at tabloids and sensationalism.I was dissapointed to see the absence of, In My Humble Opinion,the truism: Some chicks are just star-f**kers.

It would have been nice to see a bit more about the "goal-diggers" aspect, and the broadening trend of rape accusation/extortion-blackmail against celebs with new found wealth, by after-the fact "victims" of incredulously 'innocent' circumstances.
Main / iFeminism is a scam
Aug 23, 2004, 08:18 PM
Quote from: "Dr Evil"
Where is the attack in saying that?  It could be taken as a smart ass thing to say but I don't see it as a personal attack.  Please tell me just how you see that as a personal attack?  If we banned people for saying smart ass things a whole lotta folks would be gone by now.  Would you like me to ban Devia for saying this?  If so, then I will go back and look at the last couple of days for people making smart ass comments and ban them too.  Let me know what you would like.

Nooooooooooooooo! PLEASE don't go back and have a history of smart ass remarks.

However, thank you Vic, for pointing out the usual suspects(and the usual champions). As much as I try to maintain serenity, I too see the same old, same old, and try to nip it in the bud. Unfortunately, for some silly integrity thing, I only use one name, EVER. And because I like to post here I force self restraint. Perhaps........ too much.
 I find it easier and easier to recognize the writings of specific folk hiding behind several masks. As I'm not a moderator with tracking resources,I can only OPINE this;

    LST800- "Methinks ye doth protest too much"  Shakespeare

Dr Evil
 The posts under "devia" have a clear history of childish snipeing. They have been rife with disruptive and contraproductive printed vandalism. If you are asking for input on this matter, I say ban repeated posters of "I know you are but what  am  I?" and "Who?..ME!" and, "I'll bet you....."
level of logic. It will give them more time to enrich their own web pages.
 This is MY OPINION on this poster "devia" s  musings and on this-                   I STAND MY GROUND
Main / iFeminism is a scam
Aug 22, 2004, 07:35 PM
Golly, um... take your issue up with her on her site. If your looking for "allies" in this matter you won't find them in this poster. Nor will you find long winded accolades in either direction.

EDIT; In hindsight, I'm sorry I even responded.
Main / Re: Help with translation
Aug 22, 2004, 07:19 PM
Quote from: "Masterpiece"
Hi Guys.

I'm currently writing english subtitles for a documentary which has gained cult-status among divorced fathers fighting over custody in Denmark. It exposes the most outrageous abuse of the criminal system and especially in relation to false charges with incest and abuse in general. It shows hidden recordings of the most outrageous psychological evaluations, fathers survaillanced by social workers on the grounds of NOTHING and hidden recordings of an infamous female lawyer who is best known for her use of false charges with incest in Denmark. However, my english is far from perfect and I plan to release this file, english subtitled, on the file sharing networks - and all the Mens For Justice forums I can find. I've translated nearly half of it by now and it will amount to somwehere around 20 A4-pages when done. Is anyone in here interested in helping me out with bad grammar and syntaxes when I'm done? I will translate to the best of my ability but I could surely need some help with spelling and grammar.



P.S. What is the proper term for fathers seeing their children regularly  - like having their children on weekends on a regular basis? Is there a word for that situation in english?

Golly Masterpiece, your use of the English language seems to be adequate. Feel free to use your own words to transcribe Danish concepts into English .Perhaps you might consider explaining the actual context of the words you seek from a mens rights site rather than a thesaurus or dictionary. Further, you might explain your desired metephor as well as the Danish words (or concepts)you seek to transcribe.
 You see, thoughts and words taken out of context, when the situation isn't fully presented, has often proved to be a dangerous prospect for the presenter.