While I am not defending anyone on the way in which CS payments are spent, I will use the old feminist term, "choice", and say that us divorced dads make the choice every month to play by the rules set down by the courts. I choose to make my payments on time. I do not choose how to spend that money because my money has now become her money through this state-sanctioned redistribution of wealth. However, I made a choice years ago to agree to the divorce. I chose not to stay with her, with the full understanding of what the consequences would be. I knew the financial hit I would take, but I made that hard choice. And while I sometimes regret my monthly check writing, I remind myself how better off I am without her. I could not survive living with her American woman madness. My children are suffering a little bit because of it. But, in the long run, the truth will come out. What is reaped will be sown, eventually, I really believe that. As my kids get older they are starting to really understand how kooky their mother can be.
It's all about choice, keep telling yourself that. You made that choice. Now stick to it.
As the feminists say: It's your body, it's your choice.
Maybe I have a more positive attitude about all this because I'm not in such horrible circumstances as some of the guys here tell. I see my kids. I live pretty close to them. Things could be better. I'm in a tiny townhome now. My savings are pretty down to not much at all. I barely make it every month due to CS and alimony. But I know things could be a lot lot worse. So, all in all, I'm happy with the choices I've made.