Women Can Be Abusive Too By Michael J. Geanoulis
In what can only be described as a conspiracy of misinformation, data on assaulted husbands is swept under the rug.
A revealing research paper on domestic violence (DV) published in the Florida State University Law Review provides a promising new twist to a thorny problem - assuming, of course, it can overcome stereotypcal attitudes and get the attention it deserves.
According to author and Indiana School of Law Professor Linda Kelly, women can be batterers. Men can be victims. And abuse by females needs to be eradicated, as well as abuse by males. (Kelly, L, "Disabusing the Definition of Domestic Abuse: How Women Batter Men and the Role of the Feminist State;" Fla. St. Univ. Law Rev, Vol 30:791)
It will be interesting to see how Kelly's 65-page paper is received, as she treads on ground long held sacred and untouchable by women's rights goups, who, according to Kelly, have been influencing every state's DV policy using double standards and biased data which discriminate against men.
As long ago as 1981, Straus, Gelles and Steinmetz discovered some of the data referred to by Kelly, reporting it in "Behind Closed Doors: Violence in the American Family." Nearly 1.8 million American women were assaulted annually by their husbands that year -- shameful data that was elevated for all to see via insightful ads posted everywhere trumpeting the fact that "Every 17 seconds a woman is assaulted by her husband."
What the general public never saw, though, was the "real surprise," to quote the authors: 2 million husbands (200 thousand more) who were assaulted by their wives.
In what can only be described as a conspiracy of misinformation, the data on assaulted husbands was swept under the rug. No ads were ever produced depicting the average 16-second time span between assaults by wives on their husbands, or the fact that women are hitting men with higher assault rates.
And so it is, as Kelly warns against, with educational seminars like New Hampshire's annual Conference on DV sponsored by the Governor's Commission on Domestic and Sexual Violence, whose purpose is to "Improve the Investigative, Judicial, Administrative and Community Response."
Efforts to "improve" seem fair on its face -- except that judges who want to "improve" themselves should not be attending DV conferences loaded with sexist half-truths, innuendo and special agendas.
The slide presentation of one Mary Bettley provides us with the best evidence of such bias. What judge could be expected to make fair decisions after being exposed to half-truths like, "50% of men who assaulted their wives also abused their children?" Shouldn't judges also be taught the rate of child abuse for women who assaulted their husbands? And be made aware that women are twice as likely to assault their children than men?
Only half the story, furthermore, was given for the cycle of violence: "He (the boy) sees hitting and learns," reports Bettley. Don't girls learn about hitting from their moms when they see it? Was it Bettley's intention to teach the hundreds of judges and criminal justice people gathered to "improve" themselves, that only males learn about, and do the hitting around the house?
Another example of questionable scholarship comes from Dr. James Knoll, who echoed the Rule of Thumb, a damaging bit of nonsense and myth that was debunked long ago as a libelous falsehood by Who Stole Feminism author Christine Hoff Sommers. The rule, which serves as an unfair character assassination that refuses to die and which never existed except in the mind set of the feminist state, held that "men could beat their wives so long as they used a stick no bigger than their thumb."
Dr. Knoll seemed loathe to acknowledge that men have a long record of loving, protecting and glorifying the fair sex -- building magnificent temples to honor women and installing them on high pedestals. Apparently it's more PC and profitable to malign men as cruel beasts, especially at federally-financed conferences constructed to teach that only men are responsible for DV.
Noticed for his absence from the conference was Murray Straus, PhD, director of the Family Research Lab at UNH and world class expert on DV who lives and works in New Hampshire. He was not invited. Was this because of his position that female aggression should not be ignored? Or his revelation that men are compelled to stay in abusive relationships for the same reasons heretofore reserved for women? Or that his life might again be threatened for treading on untouchable topics?
Will Kelly be ignored, too?
DV is equal opportunity abuse, and we should demand that all perpetrators be held accountable on an equal basis, if only as a matter of safety for women. Let's hope that reasonable and objective people like Kelly and Straus, et al, can be part of the dialogue going forward.
Michael J. Geanoulis, Sr. sits on the New Hampshire Commission on the Status of Men.
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