Bartering sex for stuff or services

Started by PowerMan72, Aug 25, 2008, 06:19 PM

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PowerMan72

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Bartering sex for stuff or services

By Michelle Goodman

(LifeWire) -- While she was studying in Brazil during college, the one thing Stephanie Gerson longed to do before leaving was spend time in the thick of the Amazon rain forest. Unfortunately, she couldn't find a tour that would take her past the forest's edge.

So, when a college-aged busboy at a resort she was visiting began flirting with her, she asked him if he thought a tourist could survive alone in the jungle.

"He laughed and told me I was nuts," says Gerson, 27, who works part-time in online marketing for a chocolate company in San Francisco.

Then he told her that he'd grown up in the jungle in a nearby indigenous community. That was all Gerson needed to hear. Although she wasn't attracted to the guy, Gerson flirted right back in the hopes that he would be her jungle tour guide. It worked. The busboy wormed his way out of work, and the two headed into the rain forest.

"It was amazing," Gerson says of her adventure in 2000. "We built our homes out of palm leaves, I saw animals I'd never seen before, he taught me the medicinal properties of all the plants, we picked fruit off the trees, we swam with and ate piranhas. And, of course, we had sex ... for almost two weeks."

Body currency system

Gerson never felt sleazy or uncomfortable with her unspoken arrangement with the busboy.

"It was a good barter both ways," she says. "I got to stay in the jungle, and he got to have sex with a cute, young American girl."

Such trades aren't so unusual. Throughout history, humans have used their bodies to get what they want -- from ancient Egyptian ruler Cleopatra, who cemented her power through liaisons with Roman rulers Julius Caesar and Mark Antony, to the man and woman who were arrested at a Fort Wright, Kentucky, motel in late June for allegedly swapping sex for gasoline. Regardless of our motivation, scientists say we're hardwired to use our bodies as a bargaining chip.

A recent study of 475 University of Michigan undergraduates ages 17 to 26 found that 27 percent of the men and 14 percent of the women who weren't in a committed relationship had offered someone favors or gifts -- help prepping for a test, laundry washing, tickets to a college football game -- in exchange for sex. On the flip side, 5 percent of the men surveyed and 9 percent of the women said they'd attempted to trade sex for such freebies.

And although they weren't hard up for resources, the students surveyed "recognized the value of this socioeconomic currency system," says Daniel Kruger, research scientist at the University of Michigan School of Public Health, who published his findings in the April issue of "Evolutionary Psychology."

"It's more about getting what you want than getting what you need," he says. "Unless you think everyone needs a $200 Louis Vuitton bag."

The handyman hookup

But unattached coeds aren't the only ones who barter with their bodies. Some professionals will attest that their skills are, well, sexy.

"Women are turned on just by the simple idea of their guy getting off his ass and doing something for them," says Rocky Fino, author of "Will Cook for Sex: A Guy's Guide to Cooking."

It works both ways, he adds.

"Give it to me first thing in the morning, and I'll play [handyman] all day," says Fino, a 39-year-old father of two and part-time construction worker.

Ben Corbett, a 39-year-old contractor from Boulder, Colorado, credits his tool belt with prompting the barrage of come-ons he fields from female clients -- most of them married -- on a regular basis.

"It starts with the flirting, and it just progresses," says Corbett, who has run a construction and remodeling business for 20 years. "They'll touch my hand, and there's all this physical contact. Or they'll run around in their pajamas."

"Once," he says, "I was painting the hallway right outside a client's bedroom, and she was lying on her bed like a girl at a slumber party with her legs up and her arms crossed and her head resting on them, asking me if I had a girlfriend.

"It's all about the fantasy of being taken by the rough-hewn construction guy," muses Corbett, who, despite the temptation, has avoided getting sexually involved with his clientele for fear of jeopardizing his business.

It's the biology, stupid

Call it crass, sexist or gender stereotyping all you want, but there are thousands of years of biological programming at work here, says Dr. Chris Fariello, director of the Institute for Sex Therapy at the Council for Relationships, a nonprofit relationship-counseling group based in Philadelphia.

Plain and simple, a partner who provides more resources -- wealth, shelter, home repairs -- is seen as more attractive and stands to reap more sexual rewards.

Or, as Fariello puts it, "I don't get anybody in my office who says, 'My husband sits on the couch all day and eats bonbons, and I want to have sex with him all the time.'"
Senator Daniel Patrick Moynihan: "Everyone is entitled to his own opinion, but not his own facts."

Virtue

Trading sex for commodities = Whore

Never have been nor ever will be interested in a whore for any type of relationship.....There cum dumpsters and nothing else.
Imagine waking up tomorrow to find
that unbelievably rape is now legal.

You would be freaking out, telling everyone you ran into this is crazy- something needs to be done... now!!! And then every man you told this to just very smugly and condescendingly says...

"Hey... not all men are 'like that.'"

Virtue

Amazing you should read the Digg Comments about this article!
Imagine waking up tomorrow to find
that unbelievably rape is now legal.

You would be freaking out, telling everyone you ran into this is crazy- something needs to be done... now!!! And then every man you told this to just very smugly and condescendingly says...

"Hey... not all men are 'like that.'"

Nillerz

Trading sex for commodities = Whore

This.

Evolution doesn't stop at the neck.

Stallywood

Err.... Prostitute fit the bill.  And then what follows is a massive rationalization of it.
Stally
Gentleman is a man who consciously serves women. I prefer the golden rule.

Behind every great man, is a
parasite.

Women who say men won't commit, usually aren't worth committing to.

K9

But this same female and her twit friends would be screaming their heads off if someone "stole" what they trade away. Put a price on her "jungle" experience and a rapist is guilty ONLY of stealing that amount. "Theft of services" anyone?
Explaining misandry to a feminist is like explaining "wet" to a fish.

Virtue

I really like how Devia and her like avoid these threads like the plauge
Imagine waking up tomorrow to find
that unbelievably rape is now legal.

You would be freaking out, telling everyone you ran into this is crazy- something needs to be done... now!!! And then every man you told this to just very smugly and condescendingly says...

"Hey... not all men are 'like that.'"

SIAM

Quote
I really like how Devia and her like avoid these threads like the plauge


devia seems to think it's no problem for women to barter for sex, and was confused when I said that there exists in this world women who would be insulted if you assumed they did this for a living (devia's line of thinking being that prostitution was their most lucrative career path, therefore that's what they choose to do).  It doesn't seem to occur to her that the vast majority of women aren't interested in prostitution whatever the possible financial gain

That's not to say monogomous partners do not barter money and sex (of course they do), but that's something else entirely.  To think women have zero problem sleeping with dozens of guys every month is a bit extreme.  I'm sure even prostitutes resent their tally of men they've slept with.  Biologically it doesn't make sense for women to be promiscuous to such an extreme extent (even if you cheat on your partner, one Alpha male required only) so there's no biological incentive.  So financial incentive only? For a tiny number of women I would venture this would work.   

Virtue

Quote
That's not to say monogomous partners do not barter money and sex (of course they do), but that's something else entirely.


I disagree

pros·ti·tu·tion (prŏs'tĭ-tū'shən, -tyū'-) pronunciation
n.

   1. The act or practice of engaging in sex acts for hire.

the practice of selling sex for cash or other immediate compensation

http://www.answers.com/prostitution&r=67


and,

http://www.backlash.com/book/prostit.html



Trading sex for anything is prostitution no matter the context.
Imagine waking up tomorrow to find
that unbelievably rape is now legal.

You would be freaking out, telling everyone you ran into this is crazy- something needs to be done... now!!! And then every man you told this to just very smugly and condescendingly says...

"Hey... not all men are 'like that.'"

SIAM

virtue, I think it's more subtle in relationships.  Nobody sets zero conditions when looking for a partner.  It does matter if a guy is homeless and hasn't had a shower for 6 months - his great personality and kindness won't ever be discovered by women.  To a lesser extent, ugly women will find it harder to catch the alpha males (who are pre-occupied by the more beautiful women).  Sound cruel? It's just life.  It's people bartering currencies of beauty, money and status with one another.  Maybe in the ideal world this should not happen, but it does happen.  This kind of bartering is more natural to women because their biology is more aligned to monogomous relationships.  Out-and-out prostitution (i.e. a fulltime job) is something a lot less appealing and unnatural to women I would argue.   That is the distinction I was making.


Stallywood

And this is why many people see marriage and especially dating as legalized prostitution (In many cases).
Stally


Quote
That's not to say monogomous partners do not barter money and sex (of course they do), but that's something else entirely.


I disagree

pros·ti·tu·tion (prŏs'tĭ-tū'shən, -tyū'-) pronunciation
n.

   1. The act or practice of engaging in sex acts for hire.

the practice of selling sex for cash or other immediate compensation

http://www.answers.com/prostitution&r=67


and,

http://www.backlash.com/book/prostit.html



Trading sex for anything is prostitution no matter the context.
Gentleman is a man who consciously serves women. I prefer the golden rule.

Behind every great man, is a
parasite.

Women who say men won't commit, usually aren't worth committing to.

Virtue

Quote
virtue, I think it's more subtle in relationships.  Nobody sets zero conditions when looking for a partner.  It does matter if a guy is homeless and hasn't had a shower for 6 months - his great personality and kindness won't ever be discovered by women.  To a lesser extent, ugly women will find it harder to catch the alpha males (who are pre-occupied by the more beautiful women).  Sound cruel? It's just life.  It's people bartering currencies of beauty, money and status with one another.  Maybe in the ideal world this should not happen, but it does happen.  This kind of bartering is more natural to women because their biology is more aligned to monogomous relationships.  Out-and-out prostitution (i.e. a fulltime job) is something a lot less appealing and unnatural to women I would argue.   That is the distinction I was making.



Place this in another context:


What do you (or any man) look for in a woman?


Do you care what kind of job she has?
Do you care if she is rich?
When you look at her do you ask yourself.....what can she do for me today?


Quote

It's people bartering currencies of beauty



Here is this point I cannot disagree with completely but I can argue it.


Both sexes will seek the most attractive mate that they possibly can......since this is the same on both sides it can be taken out of the equation (mathematically speaking)

Besides with out physical attraction (the natural or God made element of attraction) There would be no sex at all and thus the argument were having would be moot.


Only women (in statistically significant numbers) trade sex for favors

Male prostitution almost exclusively caters to other men.

SIAM, please not I am not disagreeing with your facts or your point of view.....I am disagreeing with your conclusions .....I see a flaw in your logic....its a flaw that all men (and women) in the west were taught since birth to ignore.
Imagine waking up tomorrow to find
that unbelievably rape is now legal.

You would be freaking out, telling everyone you ran into this is crazy- something needs to be done... now!!! And then every man you told this to just very smugly and condescendingly says...

"Hey... not all men are 'like that.'"

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