Parents-to-be shun marriage vows

Started by PowerMan72, Oct 08, 2004, 10:14 AM

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Parents-to-be shun marriage vows

Nearly half of all pregnant women and expectant fathers no longer think it important to be married before having a baby, a survey suggests.

The Pregnancy & Birth magazine questioned 2,000 pregnant women and their partners.

Only 55% of women and 52% of men believe it is better for them to be married, it found.

But the men wanted overwhelmingly to be involved fathers - with 95% believing they were as important as mothers.

In addition, a total of 96% of the men surveyed believed they share the same rights to the child as the mother should the relationship fail - and nine out of 10 women fundamentally agreed with them.


"What couples are saying is that the marriage certificate today is not as important as their commitment to each other and to their children," said Kaye McIntosh, editor of Pregnancy & Birth magazine.

"The dad's role is considered as just as important by both the men and women, and that is quite striking.

"Lots of the men want a hands-on-role and would love to stay at home and look after the kids if they were financially able to."

This desire for a 'hands-on' role was also shown by the third of fathers-to-be who felt paternity leave should be 10 weeks long.

However, the vast majority of men wished their baby's mother could be 'a stay at home mum' with a total of 87% saying it bothered them if they could not be the total breadwinner.

The Pregnancy & Birth Relationship and Fatherhood Survey 2004, which aimed to chart the changing face of parenthood, suggests the complicated nature of modern relationships.

Almost a quarter of the pregnant women questioned said they would most likely be a single mother - including 13% who did not think their relationship would last.

Story from BBC NEWS:

Published: 2004/10/07 23:19:29 GMT
Senator Daniel Patrick Moynihan: "Everyone is entitled to his own opinion, but not his own facts."


>a total of 87% saying it bothered them if they could not be the total breadwinner.<

Fine, whatever.  That's an un-healthy leftover of chivalry in this day and age.

One of Marty Nemko's career rules for men is:

"Do not uncritically accept that you should be the primary breadwinner.  Each couple must discuss this openly. In being the primary breadwinner, are you forced to take a job that makes you unhappy or overly stressed? Would you be much happier in a lower paying job? Are you staying in a distasteful job merely to afford nicer housing? Is it worth it? Should your wife assume more of the financial responsibility even if she's not at home as much with the kids? (The evidence is equivocal on whether stay-at-home moms' kids do better.) Should you do more of housework? The parenting? Fortunately, there are no rules--there is no more "men's work" or "women's work." Each couple should craft for themselves the division of labor that best accommodates both spouses' strengths and preferences."


Quote from: "Titurel"
>a total of 87% saying it bothered them if they could not be the total breadwinner.<

Stats can prove anything. This may simply be a funtion of men wanting their wives to spend more time with the children. Which said wives could do, if hubby had a decent job.
Gentleman is a man who consciously serves women. I prefer the golden rule.

Behind every great man, is a

Women who say men won't commit, usually aren't worth committing to.


they would make a great couple.   :lol:

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