Started by daksdaddy, Jan 15, 2005, 02:34 PM

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Thanks to all my friends who sent me such important emails in 2003 & 2004!

It's so wonderful that you included me in your quest to inform!

Because of all of you I stopped drinking Coca-Cola after I found out from
you that it's good for removing toilet stains.

I stopped going to the movies for fear of sitting on a needle infected with
a disease.

I smell awful, but thank goodness I stopped using deodorant because you
said it causes cancer.

I don't leave my car in any parking lot even though I sometimes have to
walk about seven blocks, because you said that someone might drug me with a perfume sample and then try to rob me.

I stopped eating chicken and hamburgers because you told me they are
nothing more than horrible mutant freaks with no eyes or feathers that are bred in a lab so that places like McDonalds can sell their Big Macs.

I also stopped drinking anything out of a can - you said that I will get sick from the rat feaces and urine.

When I go to parties, I now don't mix with anybody - you said that someone will take my kidneys and leave me taking a nap in a bathtub full of ice.

However, the police are also after me at present because you said not to
pull over as they could be fake policemen trying to kidnap me.

I went bankrupt from bounced checks that I wrote, in anticipation of the
$15,000 that Microsoft and AOL were supposed to send me when I participated in their special e-mail program.

It's weird, though, that my new free cell phone never arrived, and neither
did the passes for my paid vacation to Disneyland.

But I am positive that all this is because of the chain I broke or forgot
to follow and I got a curse.

OOPS I ALMOST FORGOT, IMPORTANT NOTE: If you don't send this e-mail to at least 1200 people in the next ten seconds, a bird will crap on you tonight at 7:00 PM.

Happy New Year!!!

and May it be a good one.
t is perhaps a terrible thing to say, but "rights and freedoms we are not willing to fight for are rights and freedoms we don't deserve."


LOL!!! :lol:
Feminism is the product of female selfishness, compounded by male chivalry.

- Peter Zohrab -


See, now if you'd just given your bank account numbers to the Liberians so they could sneak their inheritance out of the country you'd be on easy street by now!

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