Russ,
I think you are right on. Lot's of people have said here what they think a woman wants from a man, this conversation was about what a man wants from a woman.
When I first met my husband, he was much the same mindset as our friend, "so I'll be traveling about 3 months out of the year solo is that as problem?" Nope I said and I still believe it, he has heads up as far as doing the Texas golf thing whenever he wants.
But... I see it as giving him his space not filling my own need. I may be fully functional on my own but when he's gone I cry because he's gone (I don't mean the drama queen real tears thing, I just love being with him, as corny as this sounds my eyes light up when he comes in).
In his mind (as far as I can feel confident in speaking for him) he's gone from I'll be gone for a month twice a year wherever I may wander to saying besides golf vacations I like experiencing life with you and let's travel together.
When my husband takes off for the weekend with the friend is about both his rights as an individual and the understanding that each partner in any partnership has to have their own life away from being joined at the hip.
However couples who love each other love going through life together. While our friend is not jealous of us he's aware that our somewhat interdependence feeds both of our needs. Part of him, although he loves taking off to where ever without a cause in the world I think wishes someone (the girlfriend in question) wanted to go with him.
Conspiracy Theory,
In a somewhat ironic manner, the most loving role model of a couple Corey and I have is our friend above parents. Both of us (again excuse me for speaking for him) wish very strongly to have, and strive to have what they have.
I cannot imagine a stronger love (though we work towards it). They may not have NEEDED each other, but I'm of the mindset that real love is not about need. +80 with the passion thay have for each other ..... please.
Gonzokid- Sorry but you're still completely missing the point. He does/enjoy her, she does/enjoys him. Neither is hitting the love spark for each other. What's he missing, what's she missing, this would be a conversation. What she is lacking is not, what he is lacking is not. Between the two of them who's going to say "I LOVE YOU" first.... Neither. They are peers.
Again I think you're just lacking in the understanding of the male-female spark. Listen to a lot of Dylan and maybe it might become clearer?
When I think of you, or AngryHarry my first though had been what does this guy want? Do they want a 50/50 work/home partnership? Yes/no equality or no.
Roy,
Unfortunately, your thoughts are quite deep and in some ways I agree with them. I wrote a page and then erased it because of lack of time questioning my responces. I would however in the future write back to pursue what you said further.
In lei of debate if I haven't came back to this thread within the week and you still want me to, send forth the message privately or I will be forever ...embarrassed?
As a hint I would run the risk of saying that without psychological need (as opposed to physical or menial) we would have no need for anyone.