It is really sad, I know. I for one was more afraid than bored with the nice guys-as I said, nice guys have feelings and if something went wrong it was probably my fault, and that was scary for me. As a whirling dirvish who barely stopped to sleep, the idea that a slow steady sweet guy would get caught up and spit out in my chaos and expose my life for what it was was something I did not want to think about. I did have feelings, not that you would have known it looking at me.
As I also said, I do not think that any of this is conscious. I think to the average woman at the time, she is just enthralled with the bad guy and uniterested in the good guy, he is not even on her radar. It is not until retrospect that women look back and see what their pattern is. I do not know many women who cannot look back and wish they had made an effort with a certain nice guy in their past.
This all said, I also know men who do the same damn thing. They go from one idiot girl to the other, women who are psychotic, and unfaithful, and usually have several kids from different dads, but has a great ass and gives good head. Then the girl who is fat but absolutely sweet, inexpirienced and very eager to be a good long term partner goes single.
I had a friend who at 34 had never gone on a date. She is an awesome person, funny, smart, thoughtful, but weighs over 250 pounds. She is an English professor, owns her own home, is tidy and self sufficient. However, shyness and weight make it impossible for her to find a man interested in her. It is truly depressing, when a self centered skinny bitch like I was when I met Dave could get such a great guy, but this woman can't even get a date.
Human nature is a funny thing.
