Joke about ATM use

Started by johnnyp, Nov 16, 2005, 11:25 AM

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johnnyp

A sign in the Bank Lobby reads: "Please note that this Bank is installing new Drive-through teller machines enabling customers to withdraw cash without leaving their vehicles. Customers using this new facility are requested to use the procedures outlined below when accessing their accounts. After months of careful research, MALE & FEMALE procedures have been developed. "Please follow the appropriate steps for your gender."

MALE PROCEDURE:

1. Drive up to the cash machine.
2. Put down your car window.
3. Insert card into machine and enter PIN.
4. Enter amount of cash required and withdraw.
5. Retrieve card, cash and receipt.
6. Put window up.
7. Drive off.

FEMALE PROCEDURE:

1. Drive up to cash machine.
2. Reverse and back up the required amount to align car window with the machine
3. Set parking brake, put the window down.
4. Find handbag, remove all contents on to passenger seat to locate card.
5. Tell person on cell phone you will call them back and hang up
6. Attempt to insert card into machine.
7. Open car door to allow easier access to machine due to its excessive distance from the car.
8. Insert card.
9. Re-insert card the right way.
10. Dig through handbag to find diary with your PIN written on the inside back page.
11. Enter PIN.
12. Press cancel and re-enter correct PIN.
13. Enter amount of cash required.
14. Check makeup in rear view mirror.
15. Retrieve cash and receipt.
16. Empty handbag again to locate wallet and place cash inside.
17. Write debit amount in check register and place receipt in back of checkbook.
18. Re-check makeup.
19. Drive forward 2 feet.
20. Reverse back to cash machine.
21. Retrieve card.
22. Re-empty hand bag, locate card holder, and place card into the slot provided.
23. Give dirty look to irate male driver waiting behind you.
24. Restart stalled engine and pull off.
25. Redial person on cell phone.
26. Drive for 2 to 3 miles.
27. Release Parking Brake.
 woman needs a man like a fish needs water

Gerard Velthuis

I don't mind women's jokes, I actually like the fact that sometimes people can laugh about women since nowadays this is considered totally non-PC and only male-bashing jokes seem to be appropriate anymore.

However I think the joke goes to far and is too irrealistic.

Quote
8. Insert card.
9. Re-insert card the right way.


Quote
20. Reverse back to cash machine.
21. Retrieve card.
t is time men start behaving like men again and stand up for their rights, instead of behaving like conformist push-overs.

contrarymary

I can't tell you how many times I've inserted the card the wrong way and/or forgotten the card.
I'm not sure it's a female thing, but it's definitely a "Rosemarie" thing.
quot;I can resist anything but temptation."

 Oscar Wilde

whome112

My hands shake so much that I can hardly get the card into the slot. My wife makes BAD jokes about "hair" ... 'nuff said.

whome
ay what you mean: Mean what you say.
http://jwwells.blogspot.com

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